Paedophilia

I have been having discussions lately with a friend of mine who has an interesting theory. I would like any feedback.

Paedophiles, that is, people who lust after children - not people who actually act on that urge - are not confused, they are not misguided, nor are they 'wrong'. The theory is as follows:

Paedophilia is like being gay, or, for that matter like being straight. Think, I'm a straight chick - I look at a mans biceps and go crazy, in the same way a lesbian might go mad for a womans chest - why? Because we just do... It's just the way it is for us. We can't control what turns us on.

Just imagine, if the only thing that turned you on sexually was a child. You know it's 'wrong' you know that you can never in your life act on it, but... what can you do? Did you choose it? No.

Imagine living your whole life knowing that you will never be truly sexually satisfied. For instance, if you are a straight woman, imagine if it was 'socially unacceptable' to love a man - and forever, you could never, ever touch one, but you had to be near them all the time. That is the world in which they live.

I would be very curious to see whether this explanation changes anyones paradigm...

I am not a pedophile so i can't agree or disagree with you
But i would assume you are correct

Also take into consideration the reason such behavior is frowned upon is because society says its so, if pedophile was readily accepted then it would not be a problem.

I make this statement but let it be known I do not condone this kind of behavior
Children of a young age can't not possibly consent to such sexual interaction
Whereas homosexuality is different if both parties are of the same general age group
Then it should not be ostracized.

i think there are both for everything. whether you are straight, gay, a pedophile or perhaps even in to beastiality, there are those who have been environmentally effected and there are those who are genetically predisposed. perhaps some are both as well.

Thankyou for your responses. It's interesting (for me) to note that when given this perspective, people did not write any strong argument against. That is why I posted it - to see whether that view point would make people think a little deeper about probably one of the most deamonised human conditions. (can you deamonise a condition???)

Cirrus: I think that it's hard to say that while homosexuality is genetic, paedophillia is not. I don't believe the research has been done to support that theory - I could be wrong though, and would love a reference if I am as I am very curious. There was a time when they said that homosexuality could be remedied using therapy - they were wrong then...

Wyote: I agree - there are cases in which a child who was abused grows up to be an abuser, and there are cases where ppl with normal backgrounds do the same.

Fairy: You're right. I think that anything that is not consentual is rape - child, woman or man. I wonder what is worse - to rape a child or to rape a thirty year old. I suppose childhood being such a formative time in a persons development means that their defences are less in place.
I guess my point was, the only way that it could be deemed socially acceptable is if there was proof of consent in all cases - otherwise, it is rape - a crime at any age.

If anyone does have any strong rebuttal to the initial topic, I'd truly love to hear it, I am beginning research on the subject and really want to see all sides.

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I wonder what is worse - to rape a child or to rape a thirty year old. I suppose childhood being such a formative time in a persons development means that their defences are less in place.

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You suppose?

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I guess my point was, the only way that it could be deemed socially acceptable is if there was proof of consent in all cases - otherwise, it is rape - a crime at any age.

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Hmmm. So let's say there is an eight year old girl that says yes to her 35 year old male gym teacher. Do you honestly think she is of mind to give such 'consent'. He should not be accountable for his actions, because the 8 y/o said yes?

i think thats a cop out....people who want to have sex with little children i do not belive are just born that way. i dont doubt that these people have some serious mental problems that stem from their own childhood. i dont lust after children,the thought makes me pretty sick, i work with ckildren,and i just can't imagine that....i personally despise people who act on these thoughts,and dont want to be around anyone who even thinks like that. i know this may sound harsh or intollerant but these people, to me, are just fucking sick and twisted....they need to get help

Exactly rancidkitty!

since pedaphiles often times like grown women as well as children, i was kind of suspecting it to be more of a fetish than a sexual preference... like people who are into shoes or silk stockings or voyeurism. i think i read something like this once. although maybe it could go either way. in any case, i don't think people who have this problem (and don't act on it) should be treated any less humanely than anybody else. although i do think they should get help, if that even works. can you cure somebody of a fetish anymore than you can "cure" a person who is gay? or anymore than you can turn a straight person gay? i'm pretty sure that there are probably thousands of pedaphiles in the country who don't talk about or act on their desires. you only hear about those who do, so i guess pedaphiles, regardless of the way they handle their problem, are by nature stigmatized as bad people.

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these people, to me, are just fucking sick and twisted....they need to get help

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they use to say the exact same thing about gay people, many still do.

Curious - I get the impression that you are attempting to convince us that Pedophilia is normal behavior like a gay or lesbian and should be accepted as such. I'm curious why you would encourage this attitude?

I'm sure there are some who have not committed any crimes against children but have only wanted to. But think - How would you like to want all your life believing that you could never fulfill that want. The stress could be agonizing over the years and cause other mental and physical problems.

I will agree that Pedophilia probably stems from the same mechanism as gay or lesbian. I can except gay and lesbian and allow them to live the life most suited for them. But I cannot allow a Pedophilia this same freedom, because this is a crime against children. Imagine the guilt, fear and shame the Pedophilia has to live with also.

Much more study is needed until a cure is found, and it will probably be the DNA. In the mean time, I except the Pedophilia as a fellow human as myself and treat him or her with the same respect as I would expect to be treat, except that I will deliberately keep them away from children, restricting the freedom of the pedophilia, not the children, and treat this as a disability.

There have been extensive studies done on this subject. Though I am getting older and women don't do the same thing to me as they used to, I still have to look. This same instinct is ingrained in the Pedophile except that they are so attracted to children.

I just can't believe some of the things i have read on here. I don't know how anyone can even try to justify this behaviour It is truly disturbing. Being gay is totally diffrent. Children need to be protected. If someone has even had thoughts about children that way they need to seek help ASAP.

Did you hear about the lawyer that had child porn on his computer. One file was a video of another man raping a 4 year old.

Maybe this lawyer never raped a four year old, but he certainly doesn't deserve to be treated humanely.

I hope some of you understand that 98% of child molestors can not be cured. They might learn not to molest again, but they will ALWAYS have the lust for children.

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I hope some of you understand that 98% of child molestors can not be cured. They might learn not to molest again, but they will ALWAYS have the lust for children.

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Maybe this lawyer never raped a four year old, but he certainly doesn't deserve to be treated humanely.

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So let me see if I understand what you are saying. If someone is sick and they cannot be cured, we should not treat them hunanely?

Another example of how common sense has jumped right out the window. It's got to be that prozac in the water.

i was by no means trying to say that pedophilia is in any way "normal." i just find it interesting that there is so much animosity around the subject. rather than put forth so much hate and anger, why not try to understand it and formulate some solutions. being a pedophile and being gay are obviously very different things, and the actions taken in being either/or are obviously very different. pedophilia is wrong, dead wrong. children do not have the capacity to make decisions concerning sexual behavior. plus, the trauma and other after effects are extremely severe. i have done research and actually live with someone who has been through much of this trauma.

my comment was only to inspire more thought as opposed to anger and hatered.

Well I might have been wrong compairing pedophilia to gay and lesbian.

But I fully agree - why all the anger and hatred when these emotions solve nothing.