I feel pointless.

Is there any reason to live when every thing we do goes in vein?

I hear you, Jack. I've been there many times.

After more than 20 years of struggling with the "why the fuck should I bother living?" black hole, I've concluded that the only reason to live is to figure out what is real, what is true, and what I am. And I do that by noticing everything that is illusory, false, and what I am not. That's what this life is... it's illusory, false and what I am not. It's like the opposite world. But the fact that I get so caught up in it, so damn AFFECTED by everything here, means I secretly want it to be real. I cling to the miserableness of this existence, but I do so unconsciously. And like an addict, I can't stop.

So my life is about making the unconscious conscious, so I can let it go, so I can stop. For me, that is where hope lies.

I'm not sure you'll buy any of what I've said. I guess I'm just encouraging you to find your own purpose here ... in something other than trying to get what you think you want. The quest for "what I want" is sadly disappointing.

I know the illusory of this world but that's what makes me void. I tried going back to the illusion but it wouldn't come back to me. I liked it better when I though the trivial things I did "meant something". I don't see a reason to go through any more in life. Even if I am broken, I cant go through with with death, but life is hard to get back to.

Understood .. the realization of the illusion can be rather depressing indeed. I'm glad you can't go through with death. It took me a couple tries before I came to that conclusion.

Maybe just try to be open to the possibility that there is something more going on in you than the void? Just sit and be broken .. and be kind to yourself in such a state. And wait .. and be open to something of which you have no present knowledge .. and see what happens.

And as you wait, keep sharing the pain and the void. In my experience, that helps.

I've come to this conclusion as well, but I'm getting tired of waiting. I've resorted to sites like this one hoping I could at least fined out where to start on fixing this broken mind of mine.

I would suggest that what is going on is not a sign that your mind is broken, but that it is simply breaking open. And as brutal as it might feel right now, this is really a good thing. I've found that the level of brutality I feel is in direct correlation to how much I resist it .. how much I seek a fix for it, as opposed to just letting it do what it's going to do. Easier said than done, obviously.

I've found comfort in several things. The idea of non-dualism speaks to me .. as laid out in a book called A Course in Miracles and in the eastern path of Advaita Vedanta, among many others. We are in pain because we are confused about what is real and what we are. And we are unable to get ourselves out of this seeming chaotic mess all on our own.

I believe there is help in you, in a place in your mind which is ironically not the you you think you are. But it is buried under all of the chaos .. all the concepts and beliefs and fears and doubts. And it takes time to tunnel through all that shit.

I've also found comfort in a close friend who shares my ideas and my experiences and my quest for truth. Our relationship is about looking at whatever comes up, for the purpose of letting it go. And I've found that there are others out there, like yourself, who seek a release from the illusion .. many others, I suspect.

But sadly, it can be a lonely, painful path. I offer you whatever comfort and experience I have, in the hope that it might make your search easier.

if you cannot find one thing in your life that has any meaning to you perhaps you are suffering from depression. i suggest you talk to someone in the field about how you feel.
it can make a monumentous difference in how you see yourself and the world around you.
merely existing on this planet does not guarantee a meaningful life. YOU have to make it so. YOU need to find something in your life that matters to you.

Let me ask you what defines a meaningful life? Does any thing we do really effect the out come of any thing? Nothing really changes. If you save a persons life you could just be putting off there death until tomorrow. It doesn't matter how we do things, its inevitable. We're all going to die at some point, and along with us, our achievements. No one will remember, becous memories are made to be forgotten.

...that's what makes the ephemeral far from unimportant, at least to me. What we do affects the now,and the ripples do echo with no pretense of permanence...and despite how despairing we can be about that, we're in no position to say with absolute certainty what does last and what crumbles into dust much sooner than expected. Nothing may last forever...but does it need to to be meaningful, does anything in all we say and do have to last as long as the pyramids to have inherent worth? Not to imply I dispute your point of view...I've just found a lot of meaning in every moment I've been more present that concerned with either past or future...

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Let me ask you what defines a meaningful life? Does any thing we do really effect the out come of any thing? Nothing really changes. If you save a persons life you could just be putting off there death until tomorrow. It doesn't matter how we do things, its inevitable. We're all going to die at some point, and along with us, our achievements. No one will remember, becous memories are made to be forgotten.

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Perhaps the meaning of life lies in your purpose. Despite the fact that we will die due to the limitations of our human bodies and despite the fear we may have towards experiencing such death, the ripples you create in the world whilst you are who you are maybe all that is needed to establish a meaningful life - perhaps your purpose was simply to come here and ask these questions and as a result other eyes will lay upon them and hence ponder similar things and maybe even discover answers as a result of what you have instigated.

It's hard to feel our purpose and place in the world when we feel incapacitated by the negativity that surround us. Ultimately though, I believe people are meant to experience happiness, and the lack of happiness in our lives is what leads us to not seeing the purpose/meaning behind our existence.

If we had a purpose we would just be a means to an end, an object to be used and discarded.
A robot has a purpose and a meaning, a task to perform.
Perhaps you are looking for meaning or a meaningful life because you doubt that you are?
Can you doubt the doubter within you?
Perhaps we are here to understand what we already are by realizing what we are not!
Whatsoever we witness is what we are not, only the Witness remains unchanging eternal.

Do not confuse meaning with purpose. Something may have one and not the other. When the two are combined you have art. For example, I could prepare food that will nourish my body that is bland and ugly. Or I may produce an attractive, delicious plate as pleasing to the senses as the palate.

Life does not need purpose to have meaning, nor does life require meaning to have purpose. The best life has both.

True, life may be a pervasive condition that is ultimately fatal. But it is also the very best ride in the entire park.

When you find yourself in an infinite playground don't forget to have some fun

I used to be busy building a life just as we're taught, but at some point I started to notice how hollow and empty it was, that I'm only maintaining a facade, and that I actually felt quite bad behind it. It was all pointless and meaningless. I didn't know what to do since I didn't understand the problem, so I kept on doing as I'd always done. I recently found out about a book/philosophy and it caught my interest.

According to it we copy thoughts from our environment since childhood. These outer thoughts strongly define what we should do in life (outer values etc) and therefore they become outer wills that replace our own original and genuine will.

Thanks to the book, I've actually managed to change a lot in a relatively short time. I've become more conscious of my own will and I've learned how to listen to myself, so the change happened inside me first. Now I've started to change things in my outer life. To make a long story short, I Highly recommend everyone to check out Alkuajatus (Finnish for The Original Thought).

We have to strive forward and persevere any way so why worrie.