Soul Mate?

It seems to me that I have been looking for ever for my soul mate. I think I have lost hope. I think that maybe my ideal of a soul mate, isn't fit for reality.

maybe your expectations are too high....in reality your probably never going to find someone who thinks and feels exactly as you do....my sugestion is to find someone you can love who loves you and accept their flaws and your differences because no person or relationship is ever perfect

Exactly. There's no such thing as a 'soul mate'. You can still love somebody, bu they will never be another part of your soul. Relationships are about compromise. If we all held out for our 'soul mate' then the human race would eventually become extinct.

Soul mates do exist. You just need to know what you are looking for. A soul mate is one who complements you. A person is enough like you to understand you and different enough to appreciate you. It seems in these days soul mates are often confused with 'friends with benefits' and other such nonsense but real soul mates do exist.

"Your expectations are not too high. Do not ever believe that your expectations are too high."

well said. i beleive that heir are soul mates. but not just one for every person. i beleive that their are people out there that will make us fall in love before we even talk to them. but most of the time, we get scared and dont go for it. and just because when you first start dating someone and they dont see 'perfect' for you, doent meen they wont turn into that person later on.

Decius, very well put all around. I am a person who is lucky enough to believe that i have found my soul-mate. The first time i saw this girl i knew she would be mine. I was never anything but my complete self to her. The only problem is that i kept denying it to myself the entire time we were together, all my friends told me that they'd never seen anyone let alone just me as happy with another person before in their lives. But, like Decius said, i gave in to my own stupidity and thought that maybe just because she didnt look exactly the way i always thought i wanted my mate to look, or have the brain or the hobbies or the wit or whatever the hell i was thinking for whatever reason i gave up on it in search of another. Ohh and trust me i've paid for it. Why do i know she is my soulmate? Thousands of reasons that mean to much to me to be set aside by critics and sceptics. Many things have happened between us that you could put on a spiritual level, or a level of some kind of magical realm. Coincidences, deja-vu's, serendipity's everything that is only explained by leaving it unexplained has taken place and that is my explanation. So, then, my advice is follow Decius' advice, and become one with yourself, and if it is meant for you, that person will come along, often times this happens even without your knowledge, could be someone passing by on the street or a someone you've know for years, but my God, please if they do come along take them hold on tight ( not too tight so as to suffocate) and enjoy what is the purest and greatest pleasure of life, the one true and meaningful pleasure and my own personal idea of the absolute best thing in life. True love.

If I may rabble on about my personal feelings......

I am at peace with my self. I have delt with "not needing one now".(hard to do). I am at peace with the direction of my life. However I think I will not find a soul mate because I consider myself to be a bit of a "nutty" philosopher.

Kinda hard to love.......

to me a soul mate would be someone who completely understands you, and who feels in the same manner(intesity) that you do.....and although i would like to belive that exists....i dont.....i think there are people who you can love very strongly and who will love you....but, it will never be perfect, there will always be a flaw, even if it's minute

Flaws are the real perfections of people. Everyone is perfect. And that's not to say that noone is. You just have to be smart enough when you find them to realize that they are perfect for you. Anyways, think of how great you would feel about finding a woman who was a "nutty philosopher" like you.. she's out there, be patient, but don't wait you still have to keep your eyes open without necessarily looking..

You can only try someone out...If it's not them it's not them. But never loose hope. Their out there. Just a simple question of where. Young people for some reason in this world believe that finding a soul mate is mandatory. There's no where writen that says you have too.

Soul mates, oh lawd, don't get me started.

I am one of those people who has been dreaming about soul mates all their lives, even to the subconscious days of childhood. I can look back at my former childhood crushes, longings, daydreams, heroes, father figures, and behavior, and it is totally evident to me that all of my life I have been searching for a counterpart, a soul mate, an other half, albeit subconsciously until a few years ago.

I believe there is more than one soul mate for every person. People get too fixated on a concrete defition, a concrete person, a concrete ideal, a concrete relationship that will play out exactly how they imagined it and longed for it all of their lives. It doesn't happen like that, and I highly recommend that people get realistic. However, I do not believe that one should lower their standards, settle for less, and stop believing in a soul mate.

I believe that one should continue to believe in themselves and develop themselves as a person, especailly your most unusual and defining qualities, pursue the hobbies and dreams that inspire you, and continue to learn, grow, expand, and develop your fundamental values. I believe the fundamental personality quirks and talents are what will utlimately lead you to your soul mate. Not wandering foolishly through the library hoping to find a young man kneeling down reading your favorite book, not pretending that you will both catch eyes on a random bus ride to work in the morning, not going out Friday night and making a self fulfilling prophecy like "Tonight's the night I meet him!", not by sitting in class and listening to a mildly-intelligent young man speak his opinion and instantly idealizing him and saying "Is he the one?"

I think we must love ourself and develop who we truly are and learn how to be happy with our self. This is all we can truly do until the time has come. Loving yourself and Life tends to be come consuming. I think that your passion an your soul mate's passion will ultimately unite the two of you.

I don't think one should stop dreaming about the love of their dreams. I don't think one should settle for less. i don't think one should stop idealizing love. I don't think one should stop waiting fo the day.

However, I do believe one should tap into their own subconscious and analyze what truly motivates them to find their soul mate. Is it to fulfill some void from your childhood or indirectly satisfy a subcoscious longing of the past? I think people should be very carefully in defining the difference between love and subconscious fulfillment, because subconsciously dependent relationsihps are dangerous and deceptive.

True love is very real but I think the reason many people dont' find it is because they forget the meaning of "true". True requires SOOO much that many people aren't capable of.
They want the love, but they can't handle the true. It takes both.

Honestly, I believe that a strong sense of self determines whether or not you find the love of your life. You have to develop your uniqueness and pursue it with zeal, you must make your dreams come true, you must live by your values, you must develop your quirks and our talents. This is what bonds people otgether. Your dedication to your dreams and quirks will somehow deliver you to a person with dedication to their dreams and quirks and somehow y'all will complement eachother. But it take sstrength of self and self love first. I know that for sure.

However, I will continue dreaming of my mutative, bizarre, freaky, manly, intellectual, brilliant, genius, nerdy, heroic soul mate!

It's odd how we're so scientifically accurate on other threads but here I see the words fate, chance, and uncertainty. Just an observation.

Do you think there's a scientific method for finding a soul mate? People do it different ways. Some people enjoy a practical relationship. Others it's all about affection. Some even just use there instincts. But, there's no real way through science to find proof that that person is truly your soul mate.

finding the right person is all about perception. if your perception of things is more scientifically based, so will be your search. believing in "soul mates" is entirely faith as well as fate based. while more logic may be implemented with some, it will still have very little to do with science, traditional science that is.

I always feel that perception is such a vague word. Perception is always different. Two guys watch a guy fall from a tree. There perceptions are varied through an infinite number of variables. For instance the angle they saw it at was different. So if it was all about perception what are the odds of someone seeing it exactly the same way as you? Zero. In comparison 5 billion people doesn't even compete with infinite. But, then you think well not everyone needs the same perception as their soul mate? That is correct which is why perception has nothing to do with finding a soul mate.