confusion

so much drama and confusion in my brain-
all this pain got me feelin like im goin insane-
don't know how to maintain everyday its gettin deeper-
i wonder how can i succeed when i feel im getting weaker-
people tryin to give advice and i hear them as there speaking-
but its seems the words i dont hear or comprehend the meaning-
theyre tryin to be a freind to me-
and the message that theyre sendin me-
i tend to ignore it seems im my own worst enemy-
the pain is my penalty-
self destruction is my remedy-
i tend to be chained to this plaque and its sickining-
god are you listening to each and every word im praying-
for real, i am ill , will you please still come and save me!