I hate people and feel better alone - Page 2

I know how you feel. I am 67 years old and I socialized for years in night clubs...until recently. Now I find that my own company is the best company. I am not depressed or anything as I feel comfortable in this condition. For some strange reason people have changed dramatically over the years....it seems that we are becoming more 'robotic' as time passes. Consequently people are becoming less interesting....in fact ..duller.
Many of you may not be depressed...you may have the perception that you are. Just because you avoid people does not mean that you depressed.

Some people know that there is a difference between being lonely and being alone. Some are extroverts others are introverts. One is not better than the other, nor deeper, nor more insightful. Just different. Though there seems to be more of the former.

I would think that we all get to the point where we see past the superficiality of culture to examine the meaning of our being.

At that point many might seek the comfort of superficiality, or religion, or a pleasurable pastimes to buffet the harshness of our questions; where as others might not.

I for one am comfortable being the latter, and enjoy the company of myself and occasionally, others like me. I have discovered the the former have no need for me. That is okay with us both.

HI, I must admit i haven't read every comment, but i have read most, but from what i gather there are a lot of people in a similar situation to you.
I used to be the outgoing sort, to the point where I was bordering arrogant. But recently my social status has shifted, and the things i used to love about myself have gone, and instead those are the exact things i hate about myself.
my point is this, those people who are fake, and are hard to have a real conversation with without pulling your eyes out for entertainment, they're purely immature, I don't know how old you are but this is normally a problem occurring in adolescence, like myself and once you find a new environment, you will find people worth being with.
I used to be a "popular" twat. but now i have very few friends, and i'm happier, as these friends are real, and we discus world problems, not who copped off with who at what party. all you need is a few people who understands you. So don't strive to change, just be yourself and people will open up and might surprise you.

You're not alone in your dislike of being with other people. I don't hate it , but I am extremely uncomfortable with other people. I think part of my problem, is the fact that I'm always afraid my own mask might fall off and people might see me the way I see myself. (Which would be totally crappy.) Not that I am fake either, I like to think of it as putting on a mask to deal with each situation I am given. If I have to socialize with others, I put on my "somewhat socialable nice person". If I go see my family, I put on my "somewhat unsociable but loving daughter mask". If I'm at work I'm wearing my "lets be professional and get shit done mask". Does that make me fake? Possibly. But it also means I am able to also adapt to my surroundings and function in the world around me even when all I want to do is hide away in a closet.

I have been thoroughly enjoying myself alone and it is great until someone that is not like me makes me think I need to be surrounded by people all the time. It goes in my brain and makes me question myself. People are different. I also get drained by people and sometimes get physically dizzy when I walk into a room full of people. I will start talking with someone and once I say how I REALLY think and feel others do not seem interested and the conversation is cut short. I now feel bad and don't even want to bother. It is nice when I connect with someone like me. I am reluctant to use the word hate but one person that is like the plague to me now and (I cannot seem to get rid of ) is a self absorbed, snobby, emotionally out of control bitch! I no longer believe that we are all mirrors for each other and all that BS. People are different!

The reason you hate people is because you love certain other people.

You cannot love and be aware of it without hating others to compare love with.

Post, hate is not the opposite of love. Anyone who has been 'in love,' knows that these can be just so very close.

The opposite of love is indifference -- just not caring at all.

Yeah, hating to be around people...I know how it feels like. I feel like I have to pretend like I care, and why? so that I wont be considered a freak. It's not that Im hiding it so much but...I just go on the street and feel happy if it's empty...I see someone i know and hope they wont talk to me.I search excuses to not go out, I feel releaved when someone cancels plans of going out or meeting for the only excuse of ''fun''...it gets me so numb, like ive got a facade of this half talky person when I really just want to be left alone...

I've read all the posts and the comments I feel are mostly very contructive.

Going From the first post, I can honestly say I have felt exactlly the same as you since I was 12 years old and now am 31, most of the time I just want to be left alone but others I feel I want to be around friends but at the same time I just want to go home.

I think it stems from me being bullied for 15 years of my life and no one wanted to help me, so I bottled everything up and became a recluse.

Allot of the the I am home alone on my games and am just fine with that, in work I put on a professional face, with family am a loving devoted son and with friends am friendly, I know someone has said this already but I am the same.

I have had 16 weeks of therapy because of this and this is what I was told:
I need to be around people who have similar interests to me and are not closed minded and just do what ever "society" demands is "the in thing". Saying that though I have never done drugs and never will.

I need to build up my confidance more and speak out about how I feel rather than trying to adapt to the feelings of others all the time.

Stop ruminating on things from the past or things that haven't actually happened.

Stop bottling things up till I expload.

There is more to, but I can honestly say I have not really changed, I still don't like being around to many people, I only spend 2 days a week with my girl friend which I feel is enough for me.

I go to see family but I don't like to be surrounded by them, it makes me uneasy and after a short time I just want to leave, at my girl friends, she has 3 kids and I don't like to be away from my own flat for to long as it makes me feel home sick and I don't really like other peoples kids to much but I make an exception for hers as I love her, but even then I have my limits.

Maybe I sound like a horrible person, but I can't change I have tried and with all honesty I just like being alone, I love my games and they keep me company, sad yes, but I'd rather be alone than uncomfortable and irritated.

There are exceptions to this though, people who are intelligent and can hold a decent conversation without turning into jerks and swaring, otherwise I tend to walk away and be rude but not care.

The End
P.S: this is my own experiance so please be nice, also sorry for any miss spelled words, grammer Nazi's need not reply!

Kind Regards, Kev

I feel the same, and the thing is most of the time, I am happy being alone. But people around me expect me to want to be with others and interact all the time... I also find myself without many ambitions like others. The whole work hard to have success, started from 0 made something of yourself doesnt seem like an accomplishment to me...whats the point? thousands have done it before me, thousands will do it after me. it seems so pointless to me. Life seems meaningless most of the time. The picture of life as society has painted for us. I always think there must be something more. (ps im not 58 as my profile suggests)

One doesn't have to be "sick" or "mal-adjusted" to conclude that he/she doesn't like people. Granted, most who shun the company of others do have some issues they need to face. But there are some who simply do not feel attuned to the motivations of the typical person. They don't need others to complete them. I'm not saying it isn't a plus to be able to share the emotional content that experiences can bring. But there are people walking this planet who are basically quiet observers. They are perfectly capable of interacting with others--but they do so by becoming like those others.

quote:

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Take some weed, it solves any problem

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Give me some weed, then, nigger.

You state that you feel better alone, yet you are on online trying to build a rapport with strangers? I think that you are lost! You need to discover who you are really deep inside and what you want in life. This will help you determine what sort of people you want around. I would like to know what irritates you from people conversations exactly? What conversation are meaningless? Have you ever taken control of situations, where you start and hold a meaningful conversation? If no, then you are your worst enemy.

"I don't know what might help you. I think each person has to just keep going and keep searching for something that clicks, something that helps shift the mind."

hissyfit, how do you always write what I've been thinking?? How do you write things I've thought so many times but I never knew I thought them until I read what you wrote?

Anyway just replying to the original post: "introvert" is a much-discussed and re-defined word. But I think it works well here. I can sympathize with some of that - I don't like people being who they aren't and I don't like people who talk too much. And I'm happier alone. Be happy alone

Happy to be in your thoughts, ravenclaw.