My Friend Has A Crush on Her Co-Worker, But She Is

Hey Everybody,
Well, it's me again! I figured I received so much great advice from all of you regarding me and my boyfriend I decided that maybe you could help my friend. Her name is Chantel and she wanted advice on this co-worker of hers.

Some Important Facts

Ø The both started working @ T.J. Maxx around the same time, I'd say November 2003 as seasonal workers, and now both work as part-timers at the store.

Ø The guy in question is named 'D'. He's 25 years old and goes to the University of California--Riverside. He likes to party and she found out that one of his friends is getting married next week and so he is going to a bachelor party in Vegas next weekend. From what she heard one time he's been single lately (she said one day they we closing and the manager had asked all of them what they had planned for Valentine's Day. 'D's answer was that he life in the romance department has been a bit disappointing and that he was just going to go out with friends).

Ø Now, as most or all of you know when you go to the workplace gossip is inevitable. Well, she heard from a trusted confidante at work, that 'D' and the confidante were closing one night and the subject turned to children. Chantel tells me that majorities of the ppl our age at the store (mostly the girls) (I'm 20, she'll be 20 in August) have kids. So this confidante found out that 'D' has a baby girl about 4yrs. Old. It took the confidante by surprise b/c as long as he's been working there that maybe that info would have been known by now.

Ø I'm taking that to mean that this guy doesn't talk about his personal life all that much, and for good reason especially in a very gossipy work-place that Chantel has told me about.

The Problem

Okay so here is the problem. Chantel really likes 'D'. She has told me she has weighed the pros and cons of possibly dating a co-worker and would like to go through with it. However, she is very shy. She's told me that if they are in the break room together with on their 15 min or lunch break neither will say anything to each other except maybe Hi or Bye followed by long periods of akward silences. She's also iffy about the kid situation b/c that in itself presents challenges along with the differences in ages which mind you aren't that much.

What she wants to know is how can she improve her chances of getting herself more noticeable, and what advice would you all give to her regarding the facts that I have presented here.

Oh, btw he talks and carries on conversations with everybody else but with her he ignores or doesn't say much at all.

Awe poor thing. Well my advice is if she is shy, she needs to get rid of some of the shyness. If he talks to everyone, and not her, he could be viewing her shyness....(if she is pretty too) as she is stuck up. (even though we all know pretty people have every right to be shy too without being judged)

She needs to talk to him. If she just heard from the "grapevine", about his child, and not from his mouth, obviously they do not talk at all. So.... asking him out on a date wouldn't be a good idea yet at all. Who knows... he may be all hot and stuff...but if she really started talking to him, she could actually find out he is a dork. Better to find out if they would even "click", now, at work, then going out....finding out there is no chemestry, then having to face him at work again. So.......my advice would be to talk to him.

Hmmmmm things she could say....

1. Hey, I hear you go to to the University of California...my cousin (insert fake name) goes there....maybe you know him?

2. Hey, I hear you go to the University of Cali.... what are you studying?

3. I heard your going to Vegas... where are you staying at?? I LOVE that place!!! (or iv'e never been to that one, but I heard it is nice/or sucks, hehehe)

4. I heard your going to Vegas...i'm sooooooo jealous, I have always wanted to go there!!!

5. Ummmmmm. Hey D... are you single?? (Yes, why?) Awe nothing...I just think your soooo hot. (then leave quickly)

6. When all else fails....(I live near Riverside....so I know the weather has been really nice) Hi, D......how bout this weather? It is so nice out! (or HOT out...depending on the day, lol)

My trick. (the pimptress that I am ) I would leave a note, like.......You are sooooooooooo fine, somewhere. In a locker, on his car, on his timecard, etc. etc. Start the secret admirer thing. It works. Every time. (as long as she dosen't go tooo overboard, like stalkerish.)

Anyways.........sending good luck vibes her way!!

Tell us what happens.

Evilia